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10 things I wish I’d known (earlier) about post-concussive syndrome
September 18, 2018
I’m 14 months post-concussion at the time of writing this first post. That means I’ve had 14 months to learn a HELL of a lot about what it’s like to live with PCS. Looking back on that year and a bit, I’ve compiled a list of 10 things about coping with the aftermath of a TBI that I wish I’d known earlier on in my recovery.
These 10 things will also be the subjects of 10 future posts here on dazed&concussed, so stay tuned.
#1. Attention span? What attentio— SQUIRREL!
I cannot even begin to describe what it’s like to start your day trying to compose an email and then an hour later, find that not only have you NOT sent that email, you’re currently neck-deep in a completely different task that may or may not even be relevant to your job.
#2. Tears. Tears all the time. Tears about everything.
Headache? Cry. Bus is late? Cry. Snap at boyfriend? Cry. Boyfriend does nice thing for you? Cry. Can’t sleep? Cry. Too tired? Cry. Feel shitt? Cry. Feel better? Cry. Watch a Tim Hortons commercial? Cry.
#3. Your neck is causing you more problems than you might think.
Concussions most often happen when you whack your head on something. In my case, I whacked my brain on the inside of my skull. Whether it’s from a car accident, a football hit, or from slamming the hatch of your car onto the top of your head (been there), your NECK is more than likely going to be involved. Get that shit checked out.
#4. It’s hard to talk about an invisible injury.
If I walk into the office with a broken arm, it’s easy to explain why I may be typing at 50% speed. But it’s a lot more difficult to have to explain to your relatives that you have to leave family dinner 10 minutes after you’ve arrived because you’re too overstimulated, or apologize for not actively participating in a work meeting because you’re having trouble forming complete sentences.
#5. Buh-BYE sex drive.
Excuse me while I CONTINUE to try to figure out why on earth my saint of a spouse managed to put up with me for the first year after my concussion. Not only did it rarely even OCCUR to me to get busy, when we were intimate the aftermath usually included me crying (see point #2) because I got so dizzy and discombobulated I didn’t know which way was up. (The jury is still out on how much of that has to do with the concussion vs. his sexual prowess but STILL).
#6. Why is the world so goddamn LOUD?
Music is loud. Voices are loud. Emptying the dishwasher is loud. Typing is loud. Hell, sometimes even silence is loud.
#7. I’ve never been pregnant, but I maintain that concussion brain is not unlike pregnancy brain.
Just ask Chris about the time I strained pasta…into the colander that I was holding directly above the stove, not the sink.
#8. Turns out I’m a cheap drunk.
More on this one in a future post; my concussion actually led to my becoming sober. (359 days and counting).
#9. Fluorescent lights and computer screens are the WORST.
Find every single blue light filter you can and USE THEM ALL.
#10. There’s no linear path to recovery.
This is the shittiest one. I wish I could tell you that if you do THESE FIVE THINGS YOU’LL BE HEALED, but the truth is, everyone’s path to recovery from TBI is different. Hopefully we can share some laughter (and yeah, likely some tears) along the way.
